Thursday, 6 January 2011

End and Beginning

And finally, the last make of 2010 was Monkey Mark II.  A little something for my man to take with him for the host family of the New Year party I couldn't go to. 

Monkey Mark II

Monkeys!  Mark I and II together for one minute only...
Happy New Year to one and all!  I'm a bit late in posting again, I had a bit of a crash after new year.  Days of just having no energy at all, no will to move.  I'm feeling a lot better now, but my nights are still really pants so I'm getting headachey every day from prolonged lack of sleep.  For days now I've been getting about an hour or so when I go to bed, then an hour or so after breakfast.  The rest is just occasional dosing for a few minutes.  Lying awake all night feeling exhausted is no fun. 

However, I have been doing a lot of planning...  I don't do resolutions as such, but this year I do have goals.  Too many actually, I've tried to write this post a few times and it always ends up pages long!  So, doing my best to condense things, here's my 2011 plans.

In 2011, I will...

Make 12 Quilts, 12 Bags, and at least a few attempts at sewing something different!
Maybe, hopefully, sell something!

In getting to these goals there are a few things I'd like to have done on the way.

1.    Learn how to do free motion quilting
2.    Make a quilt out of something other than light/medium weight 100% cotton
3.    Make a large (Queen size) quilt.
4.    Make a quilt of my own design.
5.    Make a quilt using small scraps, ideally a spiderweb pattern. 
6.    Get over my fear of triangles!
7.    Have a go at dying and bleaching fabric to make my own  colourways for quilting.
8.    Make more effort to try new bag patterns.
9.    Use some nice wool fabric for a bag.
10.  Practice and improve my machine embroidery.
11.  Learn how to do piping.
12.  Practice and improve sewing zips into bags.
13.  Learn how to follow vintage patterns (one day my ass might be small enough to try making clothes!)

Some list eh?  And that's the condensed version!  Also, I'd really like to learn to accept Narcolepsy, in a kind of "this is my life, get used to it" kind of a way.  I really wish I could stop feeling so crappy and disappointed in myself with how little I feel I can do.  And at the same time, I've got to stop feeling guilty when i get a good day!  I know, I know, it sounds perverse, but ever since I became unfit for work its like i feel I'm not entitled to a good day, and when I get one I feel guilty and paranoid - like one of those candid cameras from the "benefit thieves" adverts is going to spot me that specific second and declare me a fraud...  (My brain may be missing valuable chemicals but it ain't short on imagination...)  Anyway.  Time to try and stop thinking about who I was, and get used to being who I am.  It ain't going away, there isn't a cure, but surely things will get better for me once I start accepting how things are and just getting on with it.

Talking of getting on with things, I'll post tomorrow with how I've been making a start.


  1. Do you know what, I couldn't agree with you more. You shouldn't feel guilty. J (my other half) has severe arthritis and has had 3 seperate bits of surgery in as many years. He rarely has a "good" day and often does things in spite of the pain. There seems to be some sort of witch hunt in the press at the moment that back handedly suggests that people on disability are all cheating the system. I get so angry about it. It's like aiming at a soft target instead of focussing on genuine drains on he public purse. You've paid into this system when you were well. Let it support you guilt free whilst you are not! There, I've had my rant, lol!! Hang in there hun, sometimes it takes a while to rediscover your balance in life when something hits you hard, but it will happen.
    Portia (Miss P)

  2. I can't begin to imagine what it must be like suffering from narcolepsy and feeling tired/guilty. But you are right. DOn't worry about the things you can't change and deal with the things that you can! I like your organised approach of setting yourself goals for the year ahead (maybe I should get off my cushioned behind and get motivated too!).
    Oh, and your monkeys are great! Xxxx

  3. Love those monkeys!

    To be honest with you I thought you already had a 'this is my life, get used to it' attitude, but as you can see you've got supporters when you don't feel like that.

    Have you seen this month's Burda magazine? It's got patterns in there that are vintage looking and they're in sizes for the more well upholstered lady like me! I use the word 'lady' because it made me chuckle!

    Keep smiling x

  4. Thank you all, so lovely of all of you :-)

    Portia - rant away, I frequently do. Its entirely down to the new benefits system that I now have the whole guilt/paranoia/no self esteem thing in my head. I've been fortunate to be in touch with a few people going through the same so I know its not just me, but you're right, they are victimizing the very people they're meant to help and still not getting those they intended to get. They suck!

    Plumleaf - go for it, I'd like to see your 2011 plans too!

    Mimi - is this months Burda magazine available online? I've been trawling but havent found anything :-(

  5. I really love your list of new years resolutions, I want to try dying and bleaching fabrics for a quilt top! I'm guessing you are a fan of Malka at A Stitch in Dye too?

    As for your desire to sew zips into bags, I found this tutorial for an inside zip at UHandbag a couple years ago, and it has totally improved my life!

    Go check it out! Good luck with all your quilting this year, it was nice to stumble onto your blog.

    From the girl at TinyApartmentCrafts

  6. Hi Gabrielle - thanks for reading! I'm a big U-Handbag fan, I've used her tutorial for zips once, I just need to do it more and get better! Never heard of A Stitch In Dye, must find it and have a look, thanks for the suggestions :-) We should start a club for crafting in small places lol I like your blog, and I've joined the craft book challenge myself, great idea. I'm going to included sewing magazines as well as books as I buy every month but never get round to making from them much. Thanks again :-)

  7. Sorry only just realised you'd replied. I think they're on the website and click on the tab that looks like 'styles'. It's in German as I think it's the parent company, but the patterns are about £3 upwards online whereas the magazine was £4.50 I think, so if there's more than one pattern you want it might be more cost effective to get the magazine. I'll see if I can find some online for you and I'll live a link in the comments here.

    Mimi x

  8. MONKEYS!! I love them! Sorry I have been rubbish at following recently - just too much going on - so have had a quick catch up and im looking forward to seeing more amazing creations! You are so talented - am jealous.... maybe one day I will attempt something more than a kite for Ben's wall (you would laugh!!). Keep up the good work - your blog is so lovely (and funny!) to read! xxx